The Duck Face Has Been Replaced by the Fish Gape

Now that social media is no longer about sharing your authentic personality and experiences with people who authentically care about you, anybody can be a model starring in her own nonstop editorial. To deepen the illusion that life is just one big fashion spread, we’ve been trained to 1) smize, 2) duck face, 3) squinch, and now, 4) fish gape.

Following the Suzuki method, first, we shall observe the pros so we know what to copy.

*the world’s salmon population weeps, overcome by J.Lo’s beauty*

*walleyed pikes bow down to Gigi Hadid*

*random fishes everywhere rejoice because of Keira Knightley*

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, a study in fish-gaping

All it takes is some practice positioning your tongue against the back of your teeth/the roof of your mouth to get the proper slimming effect. Watch out, Rosie. We’re gunning for you.

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